Absolute love

This reflection came up in my Facebook timeline this morning, attributed to Pedro Arrupe, SJ:

Nothing is more practical
than finding God,
that is,
than falling in love in a quite
absolute, final way.
What you are in love with,
what seizes your imagination,
will affect everything.
It will decide what will get you out of bed
in the morning,
what you will do with your evenings,
how you will spend your weekends,
what you read,
who you know,
what breaks your heart,
and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.
Fall in love,
stay in love,
and it will decide everything.

So much truth resonates here, and reminds me of why love is so dangerous. When we fall in love in that “absolute, final way,” and live into that love in the way it is reflected here, we are also choosing how we will not move in the world, where we will not spend our time.

We have to be so careful about where we allow our love to dwell. Love can be life-giving and it can also be life-draining. It can inspire growth into our best selves, and in the wrong places it can drag us back into patterns of being that we have long sought to escape.

When our hearts are broken and decentered, when we are not integrated within ourselves, it is easy to fall in love (and to convince ourselves to stay in love) with people and things that perpetuate and exacerbate our dis-integration. We tell ourselves that lie that this is where we will find completion, this is how we will derive meaning, this will absolve us of ever having to do the messy, wrenching work of confronting our own lack of integration.

Let our imagination instead be captured by freedom, possibility, by what could be when our whole selves are aligned.